Hangovers and Homesickness
by PatientPoet
Summary: Dionysus x OC. Rating may change for later chapters. A very old friend comes back to find her best friend miserable and (according to the kids at camp) a bit of an ass. What happens when you mix the god of madness with the goddess of adventure? One way to find out.
1. Old Wounds and Even Older Friends

Chapter 1: A Very Old Wound and an Even Older Friend

~Dionysus

He sat on the floor of his bedroom in Camp Half-Blood with his back against the door and a time worn piece of paper in his hand. The sun pierced the curtains trying to warm his skin but he didn't feel it.

"Where are you Ven?" he whispered to sketch.

"Dionysus?" Chiron knocked on the young gods door. "If you're not out by noon your father will throw a fit" thunder boomed in the distance and the centaur added in a mutter "well, it's true".

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be down in a bit" Dionysus sighed.

The door opened and Chiron maneuvered his wheelchair next to Mr. D. "What's the matter?" Dionysus quickly tucked the picture into his chest pocket; the last thing he wanted was an early morning breakdown in front of his uncle. "It's nothing…"

"Bah! Every day you sulk and brood over a piece of paper. You're determined to be miserable. What happened my boy? You used to be so light of heart"

Dionysus bit the inside of his lip, slowly drawing the sketch out of his pocket and handing it to the older man. Chiron's eyes lit with recognition. The sketch was a much younger wine god (he was willing to guess that it had been made sometime before AD) and a slightly taller woman with her arm around his shoulders. Chiron stroked his beard for a moment, when was the last time his nephew had smiled like that?

"That's Ven isn't it" it wasn't a question but Dionysus nodded anyway. He didn't speak for fear that his voice would crack. "Where is she investigating now anyway?" Chiron asked trying to be nonchalant.

Despite the kind intentions, Dionysus hugged his knees and sniffled, "I don't know. She's probably hurt and I can't do anything about it!"

Chiron wrapped an arm around Dionysus' shoulders as though the younger were still a little boy rather than a grieving god "She's a fighter remember, she'll be okay"

_Flashback: (Dream) The Night Before_

_Dionysus lifted his head to a vast, green landscape. The first thing he noticed was that there was a giant glass divider that ran as far as he could see to the east and west. Second, he noticed that the other side of the divider about as lush as the Sahara in a drought. Finally, he saw that he was not alone._

_The woman on the other side of the glass looked up and he felt the motion knock the breath out of him. She smiled and her warm hazel eyes smiled with her. _

"_You had me worried sick you know" he told her crossing his arms._

_She lifted an amused eyebrow. Pulling out a marker she wrote on the glass "You know, I can't hear you but you do look cute when you're in a tizzy" he blushed profusely, "though really I'm just glad to see you in general"_

_He tried to calm his heart rate. She contacted him though their mind connection. That meant she was coming home! He looked down, yes a dream, he could barely remember the last time he was considered slim. _Marker… Marker…_ he thought to himself. A purple expo-marker appeared in his hand. _

"_I missed you Ven. Where the Hades have you been?"_

"_I missed you too hun but I see no reason to bring my father into this" she smirked and he rolled his eyes, "It's a long story. Do I find you well?"_

"_You find me grounded. So, ten year tops huh?" _

_It was Ven's turn to blush "Like I said. It's a long story, one I didn't anticipate would be 67 years. It involves a sink hole, several disasters, and very long stick. I'd like to tell you but I haven't much time."_

_His heart skipped a beat, "You're leaving again already?" he touched the glass, wondering if it could be broken._

_She put her hand on the glass to match his, "Something's coming. Back as soon as I ca-" Ven dropped the marker mid-stroke. The color drained from her face, golden ichor was suddenly pouring from her shoulder._

Dionysus woke in a cold sweat with tears in his eyes "Ven… where are you?"

~ Ven

It was well into the obscene hours of the morning when a very tired, battered goddess wearing a worn traveling cloak and clutching her arm limped through the streets of Olympus.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she wondered if Apollo had bothered to keep house-sitting for her. She was answered with a firm yes when she opened the door to be greeted by the chorus line of Bohemian Rhapsody coming from the upstairs shower.

She chuckled inwardly as she poured a glass of nectar and waited on the bed outside the master bathroom. Apollo burst into the room singing into her hairbrush wearing nothing but a towel and the devil-may-care attitude of a teenage girl that thinks no one's watching "MAMA! OoooooOOOOoooooo! DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU CR-" he stopped abruptly when he saw the blood covered traveler on the bed. "Did my melodious voice lure you home?"

"Did you only agree to house sit so that you could use my shower?"

"No, I agreed because I care… and because Artemis never thinks to look for me here" he conceded.

"Big sister picking on you?" Ven teased.

"No, but speaking of the matter. What tried to pick its teeth with you?"

"Your stepmother"

"Really? Doesn't surprise me in the least"

"Heh," Ven chuckled taking another drink from her glass, "No, it was 20 scorpions, each about the size of your ego"

"Hey cuz, don't hit the ego of the guy who's here to heal your battle wounds"

"You have a point there. Thanks Apollo" she said as he pulled out a medic kit, "Don't mention it. Thank you for letting me use your house as a haven"

"My home's always open to you cuz." She smiled at her older cousin. Arrogant he might be but he was still family.

Apollo gave a low whistle, "7 busted ribs, ruptured spleen (not like you need it that much anyway), and one very torn up shoulder. Did I mention you should probably report in to Zeus?"

Ven groaned, "Any chance it can wait until tomorrow?"

"I won't tell anyone you're back" he raised a finger, "but only on the condition that you keep that arm in a sling and try not to abuse your ribs too much for a few days. I've done what I can all you need to do is let yourself heal"

Ven shook his hand on it "Deal" though as he left he couldn't resist throwing a parting jest at her, "You should probably call D. He might just faint if he heard your voice again"


	2. The Uses of Duct Tape

Chapter 2: Uses for Duct Tape

~ Ven

There is a special sort of pounding headache that can only come from injury and travel exhaustion. This kind of headache obliterates the thoughts of its host, appears to entirely control the mind, and becomes severely agitated when a certain god of messengers comes knocking on your door at o' dark thirty in the should-be sleep time before noon.

"C'mon Ven! I know you're home"

"Enter! But for the love of Eros stop shouting"

"Oh good, you're up" Hermes said sitting down on the edge of her bed. Ven growled and shot him a glare that even her father would've been proud of. "As much as I love you cousin, believe me I do. If you came here for the sole purpose of waking me up I'm going to have to throw you out the window"

"Love you too. I came to see that you were okay, yeah, Apollo told me. And to tell you that Dad wants to talk to you. You are okay right?"

Ven smiled a little, Apollo was cousin but Hermes might as well have been her brother. "Nothing that's going to send me down below," she pulled him into a hug, "I assume you mean your father, not my father. Right?"

"Mine, furthermore…" Ven didn't hear what he said after that because she was much too preoccupied with George and Martha who had poked their heads over either of his shoulders, pretending to be sock puppets. "…I also thought you should know that I pissed on your toothbrush"

That got her attention. "Pardon? You have a death wish? Is that what you said?"

"Just trying to get your attention" he grinned.

"Rats?" George asked. "Good to see you again dear" said Martha

"And now I know why you were distracted"

Ven pulled two rats out her pack and started getting dressed, "Sorry Hermes, you were saying?"

"He wants to talk to you about some job or other. I want to talk to you about why it looks like a paint set vomited on your rib cage-"

"Call for you boss, Aphrodite says it's urgent" George interjected.

"Go," Ven told him, "We'll catch up later. There's no need to sacrifice your love life"

Hermes sighed, "Thanks V, and be careful, eh?"

Before she could turn around with a cheeky comment he was already gone.

~ Dionysus

Dionysus woke up at about half past eleven snuggling his pillow in a slightly provocative manner. He couldn't stop kicking himself for telling Chiron about Ven.

His chest ached more than the day before. "Di Immortales!" he muttered. His ribs were bruised a light purple, tender to the touch. The wine god couldn't think of any possible way he'd done that to himself.

He dropped into his usual seat with five minutes to spare before none other than his father decided to pay a visit. "Morning son"

"Morning Dad" Dionysus replied warily, trying to think if he'd broken any of the terms of his imprison—ahem, grounding recently, "What brings you?"

"How opposed would you be to an extra set of hands around here? Chiron's got archery covered and well, let's face it son, combat's never been your specialty" he sighed, glancing over the less than fit god, "This camp needs a sword specialist."

"It's not a question is it?" Dionysus replied, still stinging from the jab.

"No. But you might like who I have in mind" the lightning god smirked knowingly. So that's where Hermes gets it from…

"But you're not going to tell me" his father's games weren't nearly as charming when he was on the wrong end of them.

"No, I came to tell you to clean up a room for her. Have fun" with that he disappeared leaving agitation is his wake.

~ Ven

After spending sixty-seven years mapping tombs in the desert New York felt blissfully cold. Ven sat in the main square in Olympus waiting impatiently for Zeus to meet her. As much as she had missed the sound of satyr music, the sheer beauty of home, there was some_one_ she missed more.

"Ventura, welcome back" her uncle said walking in on a breeze. He'd adopted a more business-like fashion that when she'd last seen him; pinstriped suit and red tie. Still very much like he'd looked in the 1940s and his face hadn't changed at all, of course in the few millennia she'd know her uncle, he didn't change much either.

"Thank you Uncle. You're well I trust?"

That got a smile out of him. It was always he charm that distinguished her from her father, "Indeed. I'll get to the point, Ventura, do you recall Camp Half-Blood?"

She nodded. Her first home, safe haven and where she first met D. How could she forget?

"Well, Dionysus is under prohibition at the moment. He's supposed to be helping Chiron at the camp but, as you likely well know, he has no usable or teachable skill" Ven clenched her jaw slightly but Zeus continued on, "That's where you come in. Chiron can only teach combat in theory not in practice. I realize you probably need to rest after your journey but I'd like you to teach at camp"

He lifted her eyebrows at her expectantly. The lord of the skies was many things. Patient is not one of those things.

"Okay, when do you want me to start?" Ven could think of more interesting things than being a teacher but if her best friend in the world was there it mightn't be so bad. Not to mention that one (particularly a daughter of Hades) did not simply say 'no' to the king of Olympus.

"Excellent, I've already told them to clear a room for you" he grinned and checked his watch. "I'm running late… I'll check in a week or so from today to make sure Dionysus behaves himself. Thank you dear" then he was gone in a flash leaving nothing but the smell of ozone behind.

-At camp-

Ven leaned against a tree behind the Big House going through a list of possible reactions. She didn't doubt that Chiron would be pleased to see her but D? Something told her that 'sorry' wasn't going to cut it this time.

He looked very different; still short and curly haired but now with a beard (an improvement), a very ostentatious Hawaiian shirt, and quite a few extra pounds. The last bit generally meant that he'd been stressed. Very bad for an iffy reunion.

After a few minutes Ven wound up using her instinctive fallback plan. Just wing it and hope for the best.

She walked up behind him and planted a hand on either of his shoulders, "Long time no see, eh, D?"

Naturally, he very nearly jumped out of his skin, "V-Ven? I thought…"

"Sorry's not going to fix it is it?" she asked.

_Walk with me? _He asked by thought. Ven obliged and walked with him a few meters into the forest.

"No. Not really." He answered his face reddening and eyes watering. Sobriety was not kind to him.

Ven winced a little, even with a mental connection it was hard to tell the difference between D when he's pissed and when he's upset. Not to mention she was out of practice at it.

"If I can't fix it with duct tape then I'm officially out of ideas" Ven grimaced. Even 60 years of isolation couldn't make her believe that joke was any good.

He still cracked a smile and let out a choking laugh, "I thought you died Ven. Cracking jokes is hardly fair"

She hugged him before she had a chance to think that hugging an angry god of madness might not be one of her better ideas. He sobbed into her shoulder while she whispered in his ear, "I really am sorry"


	3. Memories and Sand

A/N: Anything 'like this' is spoken through a mental connection. Not out loud.

Chapter 3: Old Memories

(Flashback: Ancient Greece)

Ven put a hand on her cousin's shoulder. The temple was littered with wilting flowers; D's face was bright red. The skies outside the door were slate gray with a brewing Mediterranean storm.

"It'll be okay D"

He lifted his head from his hand just enough to give her a sad look, "It's not fair"

To make a long story short, Hera had once again taken a shot at the youngest of her husband's kids. As she could no longer drive him mad she did the worst thing she could.

It had seemed like Ariadne loved him, Ven thought. As it turned out she'd been employed to lure him in until he was most vulnerable, then hurt him as much as possible. She left him standing at the altar like a fool while his father and brothers watched.

"Why does she have to ruin everything?" he practically sobbed. Ven sighed, not really knowing how to make things better, "Hey, if she doesn't care that you're crying then she's not worth your tears. You hear me?"

D choked on a half-sob half-laugh and rested his head, as he had so many times before, on Ven's shoulder. "They'll never let me live this down" "So, it's not the girl it's the guys you're worried about?"

"Not like that! Well, actually, female sorts have proven rather difficult…" he smirked, "You're all so edgy"

Ven rolled her eyes "Don't mind me, I'm just Cerberus snot"

"Oh, that's right! Sorry, I keep forgetting that you're technically a girl"

She punched him in the shoulder, "OW! Ven! You hit too hard," he pouted.

"I'm not hard, you're just soft" she teased, "feel better?"

"Yeah… Pride still stings a bit"

Arranged marriages were something they were both used to. Generally the bride didn't like the groom, but it wasn't everyday she hated him enough to not show up at all.

"Revelries, vineyard-"

"What are you talking about?"

"Options to make you smile again. Brothel?"

He snorted, "Wherever you are is fine with me"

(End Flashback)

~Dionysus' POV

He fidgeted his way through the rest of the day. The most ironic thing, he thought, was that his father had absolutely no idea that he had a thing for Ven. In fact, he was fairly certain Ven didn't know either. Slightly problematic…

Ven hadn't answered very many of his questions, not even what had attacked her last night.

"C'mon, let's take a walk" Ven whispered in his ear. So, he let himself be lifted to his feet and followed her away from the campfire to the beach.

The two walked into a small clearing on a ledge that overlooked the beach and the last bit of sunlight disappearing over the horizon. Ven pulled a blanket out of thin air and spread it out on the grass, beckoning for him to sit.

He sat cautiously, "So, how long are you going to be mad at me?" she asked.

"What makes you think I'm angry?"

"You're blocking me out of your mind. You've never done that before"

He sighed, "Friends don't just pack up and leave for 70 years Ven"

She winced, "No, they don't." she wrapped her arm around his shoulders, "Will you at least give me a chance to explain?"

He nodded quietly, giving in to her embrace and allowing himself to be enveloped in the smell of campfire mixed with vanilla and cinnamon.

"Alright then, where to start..?"

"The beginning I imagine" he murmured.

"Okay, smart ass. The beginning it is. As you know, the point of my mission was to map the Forgotten Tombs out in the Egyptian and Aztec regions. Adventure AND dead people; clearly I was the natural choice" Ven snorted, "At some point about 7 years into the tombs in Egypt (they're still mildly upset by the way, I wouldn't recommend a trip through the Du'at until the adjust to being dead in their fun new ways) I finished a bit early but there was a massive sand storm. Well, I sort of got borrowed by the Egyptians and the Norse. The long and short of it is that you couldn't contact me because either I was in Asgard about 3 galaxies away or because I was on some wasteland excuse for a planet"

He wasn't entirely certain when he'd gone from leaning on her shoulder to practically curled up in her lap but he opened his mind to her 'What then?'

~ Ven's POV

Ven grinned, 'I came back. The story of how is boring as the Underworld so I'll summarize it in a word. Sand. Lots of sand'

'I thought you liked adventure. Why'd you come back?' D asked carefully.

Ven licked her lips even though they'd abandoned speaking with their mouths and stroked his hair, down his cheek. 'I missed you, didn't you know that?'

She felt his heart beat quicken for a moment, 'But… I thought…'

His emotions flowed and ebbed at the edge of her consciousness: surprise, confusion, and something all too familiar.

Ven leaned down and kissed him on the temple, 'I came back for you'


	4. This Isn't What it Looks Like Yet

Chapter 4: This Isn't What it Looks Like… Yet.

(Flashback: The Invention of Wine)

Ven's first inclination was to think that her best friend had gone absolutely flying off the proverbial chariot. He was rosy cheeked and tripping over his own feet; actually, if he weren't completely incoherent it would've been very endearing.

The best part, for Ven anyway, was finding D passed out up a tree with nothing on but his underwear and strip of canvas tied around his head. And snoring. Loudly. Very, very, loudly.

"Good morning Sunshine!"

"*Snore* Ack!"

Out of nowhere (or rather out of the tree) a wild demigod appeared!

"Oh, gods… where? Why? Owwww…."

"All very good questions. I was kind of hoping you could answer them" Ven told him, covering her fallen friend with what would be something like a bed sheet. "You're damn lucky that no one else saw that".

"Ugh… drank juice and the rest is blurred" he tried to stand, Ven wrapped an arm around his shoulders to steady him. "Wait," he grinned, "I did it. Liquid madness! Ouch…"

D put his head in his hands and pressed his thumbs against his temples. "Come, you're going to dunk your head in the river"

"Aw… really? But it's cold" he whined.

"I suppose I could always tell Apollo and Chiron where I found you this morning"

"You wouldn't!"

"Eh, fair enough but you'll follow me anyway because I've never led you wrong before. Have I?"

"Yes master" he replied cheekily.

"Good to see you know your place" Ven chuckled and guided him over to a stream.

"And if I don't-?"

"Not an option" Ven told him, wrapping her arms around his middle, flipping the poor boy, and dropping head first into the water.

"Thas n-n-not fair!" Dionysus lunged forward and got Ven by the ankle. What followed was the most brutally comical instance of Ancient Greek mud wrestling past, present, or future.

Of course it was no sooner or later than the moment Ven pinned D on his back that a certain green-toga-wearing god of the sea jumped out of the river.

"I'm not explaining this to your fathers. Speaking of, what in the name of Apollo's ego are you two doing?"

-Awkward silence-

"It has a name?!"

"It's a figure of speech" he replied, "but really," he gestured to the general carnage. "Could you at least give me a heads up? People would pay to see you two battle to the death"

"It's not what it looks like"

"Mhmm," Poseidon raised an eyebrow, "I'm sure it's not. Show him who's boss Ven"

(End Flashback)

~Ven's POV

Some things don't change, Ven thought to herself. For instance D still snored (if not quite so loudly as he used to). What she really wanted to know was how in the blue bloody blazes they were going to explain to Chiron why they hadn't come back to the Big House last night and why they were covered in sand carrying only a blanket.

Ven sat up and put her arm in the sling Apollo was so insistent on. Words couldn't describe how sore she was.

"Is it what it looks like now?"

Some things really don't change. Ven sighed through her nose, removed her arms, and stood to face her uncle. "I'm not sure yet"

Poseidon smirked at her, "There've been enough centuries to figure it out. Should I be laughing at your parents or not?"

"Oh gods, dad'll pitch a fit if he finds out about this"

"Does he even know you're back yet?"

Ven cringed, "Er… yeah, about that. Styx… I knew I was forgetting something"

"On the bright side, if you tell him, he'll entirely disregard the fact that you entirely forgot about him and rage at you for fornicating with one of Zeus' kids instead."

"There was no fornicating"

"I'm sure there wasn't," he smirked, "that's why he's sleeping like a rock"

"He always does that."

"Oh, so you sleep together often?"

"I love you dearly, but you're an ass. You do know that, right?"

"I'm aware. I'm also aware that you didn't say hello to me either. I thought I was your favorite uncle." he crossed his arms and pouted at her in the most childish way he could muster.

"I'm sorry Uncle P, would it help if I gave you a hug?" she slapped on a grin and held out her good arm. He pondered a moment, then shrugged and gingerly returned the hug.

"Apollo warned me. You're off the hook for now, but I want to talk to you later. Specifically about where the blazes you've been and what you've been doing with thunder thighs over there" he gestured at D.

Ven punched him in the arm, "Hey, lay off him."

"I will when you do!" he chuckled and walked slowly back towards the sea, "Just answer me on thing, okay?"

Ven quirked an eyebrow at him, "Sure."

"He's on bottom isn't he?"

~Dionysus' POV

He woke up to someone kissing his cheek, making him blush crimson.

"Mmmmmm… Morning Ven."

"Oh, now you get up the first time"

He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and leaned against her good shoulder, "Heh, that's what she said. So, what's up with the sling?"

"Heh, the kids are getting to you D. Ripped up my shoulder, nothing special."

He cringed a little, "It didn't hurt sleeping on the ground did it?"

"Not at all, don't worry yourself about it" she smiled at him and his heart skipped a beat. _ If this is dreaming, then I don't want to wake up_, he thought. "Now then, how do we explain this to Chiron?"

He looked out at the rising sun, he'd have liked it better if it really were just a giant ball of hot gas. "I was sort of hoping you had a plan"

In the end she wound up throwing him over her shoulder (after stashing away the blanket of course) then walking nonchalantly up to the Big House. It worked quite well until Chiron looked up from his paper and bowl of Wheaties to fix them with the same stare they had received so often as kids. It was the I'd-rather-not-pull-your-ears-but-knowing-you-two-I'll-probably-have-to look.

Putting down her friend, Ven held up a hand, "Before you say anything, he's not dead."

The centaur raised an eyebrow at her before replying dryly, "And all this time I thought you were sent as a mercenary. Hmmm, pity." He chuckled.

"Am I that annoying?"

Ven and Chiron exchanged a glance that seemed to say _Oh, so he only gets it in retrospect._

"Regardless, I should remind you two that you're big kids now. If you go off in the middle of the night, then the little ones will start to think that they can just run off as well" he looked at them both sternly, "Are we clear?"

_There's nothing quite like Chiron to make you feel like you're 200 again._ D thought to himself.

To his surprise, he beat Ven to the answer, "Surely you won't begrudge us a chance to catch up after so long."

Chiron's gaze softened, knowing the extent of how upset the young god had been only a week ago really took the edge off of any chastisement he had to offer.

"Alright, but only this once. Ven, I need to go over some lesson plans with you and Dionysus, before I forget, you've got a message from Demeter. I believe she wants a word with you sometime in the next week"

A realization over-took the wine god when he heard that. Ven was wrapped up in discussing how to synchronize what tactics they were going over so she failed to notice the look of fright on his face.

One wrong move and the two of them might be the talk of Olympus. Not in a good way.


	5. A Risky Business

A/N: No beginning flashback or dream today. I think the present speaks for itself here.

Chapter 5:

~Ven's POV

It took nearly three hours for Poseidon to debrief her on what she'd missed. Thankfully, he never bothered with the gossip, calling it 'business as usual'.

"So, you're gone for 70 years, come back, steal the drunkards innocence, and you don't even say hello to your favorite uncle?" Poseidon said, mock pouting, "you hurt my feelings."

"Would it help if I apologized? I've been doing that a lot lately. Didn't realize my absence was so irritating." Ven retorted.

"True usually it's the other way around"

Ven rolled her eyes at him, "Well, you wanted to talk so it seems you're stuck with me"

He threw up him hands and smiled, "Only joking kiddo, though I am curious about you and D."

"Can I have your secrecy?" _Don't make me regret telling you this…_

"Always. You know that."

Ven looked around at the rest of the coffee shop. Red awnings, metal tables, and the smell of roasting coffee; all very normal. The weirdest thing, Ven thought, was that mortals had no idea that she and Poseidon weren't normal. That the two of them were a niece and an uncle catching up on lost time that _just so happen_ to be immortal.

"From when you got back?" he prompted.

"Hmm? Oh, right." So Ven told him everything. Starting with the ray of sunshine in her shower and ending with Chiron chastising them over a bowl of Wheaties.

"Okay, first off, I'm never letting Apollo into my bathroom. Ever. Second, it's about time. I hate to sound like Aphrodite but the two of you make a great couple. Over two thousand years and you still like each other. Did I mention that he was practically pining for you the whole time you were gone?"

Ven raised an eyebrow at him, "Pining?"

"Won't even look at another woman. He-who-loves-the-sound-of-his-own-name is beginning to think D's switched teams if you catch my current." Poseidon grinned, "you're blushing."

"You're exaggerating"

"He's submissive and you're dominant. That said, the real question is, would you tap that?"

Ven sighed through her nose, "Well yeah, I just—Y'know, it sounds stupid now that I was about to say it out loud."

"I know that feeling. Usually I get it after I say something stupid, no jokes please."

Ven bit her lip, "Challenge accepted. Why are you so hell-bent on me hooking up with D?"

He took a sip of his hot chocolate, blowing bubbles in the foam, "Because you make each other happy. I like seeing you happy and he's a bloody git when-" he was interrupted by his phone blasting out Little Mermaid's Under the Sea, "Er, no sweetheart I didn't forget. Right. Uh-huh. Wait, REALLY?" his eyes widened and he nearly dropped his phone.

"I'll be right there!" he turned to Ven, "New underwater geyser just opened up and it's spewing sparkles. I repeat, either it swallowed Elton John or mermen have opened up a drag club."

Ven chuckled, "What're you waiting for?"

"You don't mind?"

"Just let me know if Elton John became a merman, if yes, take pictures."

He hugged he, careful to avoid the sling, "Thanks Ven, you're the best. Remember when you get back, kiss him and you'll see what I mean" he winked, then he was gone on the sea breeze.

She looked out at the midday traffic, _Maybe that's not such a bad idea…_

~Dionysus' POV

He had to admit, there were few people who could compete with Demeter in making a peaceful atmosphere. Hestia not withstanding of course.

She had summoned him to a clearing in the middle of a wheat field where she had clearly made the grass grow into a fine, green carpet. The air was warm and the sky filled with Toy Story clouds.

"Always good to see you awake before noon" Demeter said popping up behind.

Dionysus yelped, then sighed through his nose, "Really, sometimes I think everyone's trying to make me the first god to have a heart attack."

"Including yourself," she poked him in the stomach, "I apologize, I keep forgetting that you're so timid" she smiled and waved two lawn chairs into existence.

He blushed a little, "Low blow…" he muttered.

She led him over to a chair and ruffled his hair, "It's just a joke little sprout. I meant nothing by it."

"Okay…" he took his seat across from his aunt, "so, other than a visit, why did you call me here?"

"I can't have a midday chat with my favorite nephew?"

"Anytime you like. Seriously. I hate my job. But I assume that you had something in mind you wanted to talk about."

"Eager to get back to Ven?"

"You want to know about my social life? Can't we just talk about your latest plan to torture Hades?"

"Oh, that reminds me, I convinced Persephone to try having only all-natural vegetarian. Naturally, she has him on the boat as well and I get to hold them both to it!" Demeter grinned, "I want to know how long before he cracks without bacon"

"That's demented. Who can survive without bacon? Actually, I suppose it should worry me that you enjoy causing meat-centric strife in your daughter's marriage"

"Which brings us back to _your_ love life, little sprout"

Dionysus groaned, as much as he loved his aunt, the idea of discussing his odds with Ven made him feel sick.

"I know I've got no chance. I've been friend-zoned." He muttered sullenly.

She raised an eyebrow at him, "That's not what I was seeing. I saw her take up a job that's entirely against her nature just to be with you. That's a bit beyond the friend zone if you ask me"

"I didn't actually ask you. I didn't ask anyone."

The goddess rolled her eyes, "Well, you ought to ask her"

If he didn't know better he'd say that she'd lost her mind. "Ask her? What so you purpose I do if she says no? We'll still be working together for the next few years at least"

Demeter sneezed and all very suddenly a chicken popped out of nowhere and started clucking around his feet. "No, please, tell me what you really think of me" he grumbled.

Just then thunder rumbled in the distance. Both Demeter and Dionysus rolled their eyes. "Time's up?"

"At the risk of Hermes looking in, let's just finish this online" he sighed.

Demeter pulled him into a hug, "Love you little sprout"

~Ven's POV

How hard could it be? Really, just pull him aside, lock lips, and… and deal with the behemoth aftermath. Ven nearly kicked herself. She was the goddess patron of taking risks damn it, if nothing else she'd kiss him on the cheek!

_Coward_… she berated herself.

Her room was painted a vibrant royal blue. Boxes of personal effects were stacked against the back wall. The only things that were in any semblance of order were her desk and bed. I use the term "order" rather loosely in this case.

As is always the case with fate, the moment she made a move to unpack, there came a deliberate knock on the door.

"Ventura! Dinner's in a few minutes. Just thought I should warn you that you'll be introduced tonight" Chiron told her.

"Thanks for the heads up. I'll be down in a sec"

Chiron smiled at her. That was another thing she'd thought about while stranded. He'd been more of a father to her than king-under-the-bones had ever been. Ven shook the thought away. She loved her father. Both of them.

Looking over the dining area felt a bit surreal. Ven felt like she was 10 again and standing with a blazing helm over her head while all the other kids went stark pale and got the bloody hell away from the plague-bearer.

Of course, none of the kids noticed her right at the moment, they were much too preoccupied by staying warm in the November chill.

Chiron stood and stamped his hoof, "Good evening campers! Tonight I'd like to introduce to you our new combat instructor. Your respect, please, for Ventura the goddess of adventure" he gestured in her direction and the kids all bent their heads respectfully. It was kind of creepy.

"Now then, to the gods!"

About five minutes later D re-entered the camp and sat down to dinner with them. 'The blazes happened to you?' Ven asked.

'I don't want to talk about it just now' he picked at the food on his plate.

'How about we ditch campfire and talk about it in some manner that involves blankets and hot chocolate?'

He smiled in spite of himself, 'I like that. Blast, I was trying not to be hungry'

'Why not?'

'I-'

Chiron quirked an eyebrow from across the table, "I get the distinct feeling that you two never really need to speak. That aside, I feel you should know that you look quite strange when you just stare at each other"

Dinner dragged on like the last cross dresser on Mardi Gras. Finally, Ven found herself sitting on the couch in front of a fire with D leaning against her shoulder.

'So, what's eating at you?' she nudged him gently.

'Do you think I'm fat?' he thought the question so quietly that she almost didn't hear it.

'You're chubby. It's cute on you' something told her (mostly the fact that he blushed and wouldn't look her in the eye) that's not what he'd been hoping to hear…

'What I mean is' Ven tried for a save, 'that your body suits your personality'

_Oh styx… Why do I even have a mouth? _

'Weak?' he thought ruefully.

'No. Gentle, warm, and cuddly. You're not made for battle. It just wouldn't suit you'

D shivered and pulled his blanket tighter, 'I certainly don't see it. Especially the warm part'

Knowing an invitation when she heard one, Ven pulled him over and wrapped her arms around him. She felt him relax, 'Really Ven, how are you always so warm?'

And then she saw it. It couldn't have been more obvious if the moment had sat in her lap, introduced itself as opportunity, and ripped off its clothes shouting "take me as you see me".

_Remember when you get back, kiss him, you'll see what I mean._

All very suddenly her lips were on his. She felt a gasp escape him; felt the heat flood to his cheeks. Most importantly, she felt him kissing back. She wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him deeper.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"


End file.
